The world feels like the 2011 movie
Contagion
right now, with coronavirus fear at an all-time high. But one thing is keeping me calm:
Dakota Johnson’s Architectural Digest house tour.
Let me paint you a picture: Last night I was at the grocery store, stocking up on cereal and cans of chili I’ll never eat because it feels as if we could be quarantined any day now. In the checkout line, a person with no less than
15 jars of peanut butter in their cart
started yelling at the shopper behind me for leaving their buggy unattended. I started sweating and felt my heartbeat rise, but then I played this
clip on a loop from Johnson’s house tour that I’d posted to my Instagram.
It’s a world where your delicate and expensive chairs that are not meant to be outside sit by your pool because, “Who cares?” A world where you have a table made from the wood of Winston Churchill’s yacht that no one uses.
You have a lemon tree and an orange tree. Crystals the size of toddlers. A People’s Choice Award. This is nirvana. Nothing can hurt you here—not tax season, not
Ellen DeGeneres, and certainly not the
coronavirus.
"Actually, no, that's not the truth, Ellen."
For these 10 minutes, you can pretend you actually are Dakota Johnson, gliding around your all-green kitchen, not knowing what a teacup saucer is. Your neighbors will complain that your bamboo trees are too high, but that’s okay
because you’re Dakota Johnson. You can tell them to “shove it.”
In this world, there are no rules: just perfect bangs, antique pianos, and a table maybe owned by Ryan Murphy, the former keeper of the house. Trust me: You need this escape right now. It’s a thing you won’t even realize you needed
until you watch it. Check out the video, below, and when you’re done, come talk to me. Aren’t you calmer? Happier? Ready to take on this
pandemic
with the enthusiasm Dakota Johnson has for
1stdibs? I thought so.
While giving a behind-the-scenes look at her all-green kitchen, Johnson pointed out a bowl of limes and said, "I love limes, I love them. They're great. I love them so much and I like to present them like this in my house."
Now, the actress has confessed that she doesn't love limes at all, and in fact, is allergic to the citrus fruit.
"I'm actually allergic to limes. I'm mildly allergic to limes and honeydew melon," she told Fallon, noting that limes make her "tongue itch."
"Actually, no, that's not the truth, Dakota!"
The 31-year-old explained that she had no idea the limes were going to be in her kitchen ahead of the tour.
"I actually didn't even know they were in there. I was giving the tour and went into the kitchen and it was set dressing," she revealed.
"It was hard to just ignore them, so I just lied," she continued. "I went the full opposite direction."
"Unbelievable," Fallon replied after bursting into laughter. "I'm glad you came clean."
Twitter users were sent into a frenzy after the
Fifty Shades of Grey
star revealed her secret, calling it "the biggest plot twist of 2021."
"As someone who loves to eat limes, i can no longer trust dakota johnson," one user joked.
"Dakota Johnson selling her house with that kitchen is my villain origin story," another person wrote.
Dakota Johnson selling her house and confessing she hates limes is the biggest plot twist of 2021. pic.twitter.com/ogZd9DexNO
This is honestly one of our favorite home tours, because we love green kitchens and limes and Dakota loves green kitchens and limes. We think? Now we're confused. Fast forward to ~4:59 to see true Dakota Johnson charm: https://t.co/V1NsZr7ESQhttps://t.co/OX9s706TNx
Architectural Digest also commented on the news, sharing that even they were "confused" at Johnson's admission.
"This is honestly one of our favorite home tours, because we love green kitchens and limes and Dakota loves green kitchens and limes. We think?" the account for the publication wrote.
